Here's a shot at writing down my "daily doings" - not sure what else to call it. I feel really busy sometimes, but then I wonder what the heck makes my day so busy. So now I will know. And you will to. Whoever "you" are....Maybe you will ''' be bored at my normal day, or maybe you'll be jealous...take your pick. At this time in my life, I'm searching out what it means to live out the "Christian life." - I'm asking a lot of questions. I'm pondering the why's of life. So I guess this blog is a dialog of my questions, and the answers i may find.
Waking up this morning was nice, because I have air-conditioning in my room now. I actually awoke cold! I went downstairs to find Brandon and Will about to head off to "Rakins" - the local breakfast dinner. Two words - - home-maid biscuits. Need i say more? Brandon and Will took the 1 mile journey on their bikes, while i chose my legs. I rocked out on the way there will the song "You're beautiful" by Phil Wickham. Quite possibly my favorite song so far this year. The song causes me to smile and kinda bounce down the street. Not a normal sight at 8am in the K-town hood.
I then caught eye contact with a man sitting on his front porch. I noticed he was in a wheelchair, and then saw his wife sitting beside him. In the split second we locked eyes, i felt his pain and brokeness. I felt my King's heart of love for them. "Jesus, if you were here, you would go and talk to them, and you would heal his body." - Thus starts the conflict in my head. I'm alive to see God's love pour out of my life, wherever my feet take me. I felt drawn to their porch, BUT then again, I don't know them...what if they don't want to talk? What if they are angry at God? then my stomach chimed in, plus who wants be left out of biscuits the bros?
I continued on, essentially ignoring them. The worship music in my headphones then made me feel guilty. "Jesus is alive" it blared. "If your alive, then you'll be with me if go talk and pray with them." I got to Rakin's to find it closed, with Brandon and Will no where to be found. I started my walk back home, and then remember the couple on the porch. I walked in there direction, thinking I still could find them. I started to pray for the prodigals in my neighborhood. Then I felt like it was time to put my prayers to action. I have God's word dwelling inside me. The Kingdom of God rests in me, and it wants to come out! Headphones off, eyes set on my neighbors, I walked up to them, not having a clue what to say....but my heart beating with a love that's not my own. Is this the Christian life? To be empty vessel for God to fill with His love. To freely receive and freely give away?
2 hours later, I left there porch. I found Jesus on that porch. I saw Him in there eyes. I pray that they saw Jesus in my eyes. I listen as Jim and Linda pore out there hearts to me...Jim (47), had a stoke 4 months. He is bound to a wheelchair now. He longs to walk and move again. Linda is his faithful wife. They share stories of pain and fear. They tell of almost dying, but being rescued by 3 angles; one with fire in his eyes, the other saying its not time yet for you to die. Jim knows there's a reason why he's still on the earth. He's just at odds with what it is.
As I'm talking with Jim, Linda gets a call...she finds that her daughter who has been trying to have a kid for years, just lost her child giving birth. See begins to weep, and we cry out to God together. I lay my hands on Jim and ask with all the faith i can muster for God to heal his body. Jim believes. Nothing happens right away, but I feel his paralyzed hand, its fiery hot...not normal i think for hand that doesn't work. He truly believes he will be healed.
Today, I encountered Jesus in my neighborhood. I felt let on a little secret today. He let me partner with Him in loving His precious children Jim and Linda. And that was one porch. There are many more porches in my neighborhood, all with people crying out for something more. Some know God. Some remember faint whispers of him from long ago. Some are angry at Him. Some know God as a rule book. Some don't even consider Him. BUT everyone longs to be loved. To be accepted. To be cherished. And for some reason God has chosen us to share this love with the world. Fill us up God to overflowing with your love!!! With your compassion!!
"For it is the God who commanded light to shine out of darkness, who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us."
2nd Cor. 4:6-7